As we approach back-to-school time, I always feel like this is the season of overwhelm for me and my clients, even if they don't have kids. Why? We are coming off of summer and catching up from vacations. Even if you aren't going to school, there's still an energy that arises this time of year.
It's easy to get overwhelmed. When I was talking with one of my clients recently, I could tell from the moment she turned her camera on Zoom that something was off. She admitted that she was overwhelmed, frustrated and about at her breaking point with everything being demanded of her.
In asking her what it felt like, she said it felt like all of the work, people and demands were like an octopus, with all of it's arms circling and pulling her from all sides. I'm sure you can relate, I know I can.
One of the aha moments she had was how many meetings, decisions, tasks and communications she was doing for everyone else. It was just faster and easier for people to come to her for an answer. And in this effort to meet others' demands, she was overfunctioning.
And when we overfunction, we allow others around us to underfunction. We hold on to items we should delegate, or we “take back” delegated items when people don't do it the way we could do it.
🔥 Over time, when work is continually erased and redone, employee confidence wanes, and the drive to give good effort is diminished. As the leader delegating, it creates an exhausting overwhelm cycle. This exhaustion ends up killing the leader’s confidence, too.
Keep reading for tips to get out of the overwhelm cycle.
PUT THIS IDEA INTO ACTION
What we tend to do as leaders, and as parents or partners, when things aren’t done the way we prefer to do them or a mistake is made, is to step in and “save the day” by taking over the task and reworking it to the way we like it. It just feels better, faster, and easier that way.
While our intentions are to be helpful, the team working for us, or our partner or children, often throw up their hands: “Why should I even try to complete this project (or load the dishwasher) because my boss is just going to come and fix and redo my work.”
Thus, leaders do all the things until they also throw up their hands in frustration and overwhelm, saying, “Why am I the only one who does anything around here?”
Often times, people make high impact mistakes because leaders delegate when the stakes are too high. So, the key to breaking the overwhelm cycle is to start delegating with low-stakes tasks.
ASK THESE QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU BREAK THE OVERWHELM CYCLE:
Do I need or want to be in this meeting or project?
Does my presence add or subtract value for fellow team members also present?
Is this still a development opportunity for me? If no, who on my team can lead?
Is this an opportunity where a mistake could be a good teaching moment?
Is this project using my best skills and talents or better suited for someone on my team?
TRY THIS NEXT: Pick the lowest stakes task on your plate, who can you delegate it to so you can release some of the overwhelm?
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